Is the Hitachi Magic Wand really the best in sex toys? Is it a fad or a trend that people rave about it? Why do they keep appearing on boom mic poles in porn?

The Hitachi Magic Wand is like Buddha in that it will lead you to higher stages of consciousness. Partners may come and go, but a Hitachi is forever. A stressful day can be unwound by this plain looking device. Start with your back and work your way down. It’s so powerful you don’t even have to take your panties off to make it work. You can be so drunk you couldn’t spell your last name and it will still make you cum. You can use it on someone and turn pleasure into torture. You can make someone orgasm into exhaustion and then cum again just when they thought they couldn’t do anything more.

People don’t speak in tongues because a spirit has inhabited their body, they were using a Hitachi. Rome could have been built in a day with a Hitachi. The holes in my wall happened because I own a Hitachi. Time is of no concern because I can go from zero to stained sheets in two minutes with a Hitachi. When I have a partner who fumbles and can’t actually locate my clitoris I can hand them that magic wand. I’ve never had another sex toy that I wrap my legs around. If I had only one outlet in my house, it would belong to my Hitachi.

I rave about it because I’ve always considered myself a penetration junkie. In every other instance I actually need something inside of me to cum. Oral sex has never really been enough, nor have any other small vibrators. A light tapping on my clitoris simply won’t do. I would hardly say I resigned myself to a lifetime of fucking hard from behind, it’s something I look forward to having as much as possible. I was a bit cynical when I heard so many people go on and on about this piece of machinery. I considered myself to be a member of an elite minority that could cum solely from penetration to my pussy or my ass. This toy taught me something about myself that I wouldn’t have known otherwise.

Masturbation is one of my favorite activities. I started consciously touching myself in middle school and I’ve been consistently logging hours ever since. I’ll have sex and still masturbate afterward. When I’m stressed, I’ll jerk off. Whenever I’m working on a major time consuming project I’ll take a five minute rest to jerk off and clear my head a bit. I’ve absentmindedly done what the Dyvinyls sang about while riving from the Bay Area down to L.A. on the 5. It has nothing to do with ‘getting some’ from a partner. It has everything to do with focusing on my own body and my own fantasy. Some of the things that turn me on are just for me. Sometimes I jerk off thinking about telling someone else what the erotic content in my mind is, but I like to leave something special just for me.

The thing is, I have shit to do. My job, my personal relationships, and wasting time on the internet are also very important to me. The Hitachi allows for a quick pick-me-up. It’s made masturbation as simple as popping a fine chocolate into my mouth. It doesn’t take too much time and its infinitely more earth friendly than going through batteries. I don’t even have to worry about someone noticing that I put a foil wrapper in a tashcan. In fact, a solo romp will burn off some calories. I feel refreshed, I’m in a better mood, and I’ve even heard my immune system gets a little bit of a boost.

I rave about the Hitachi because if using it makes me feel so good, it might just be what that cranky lady at the DMV needs. Maybe the reason why that guy in line at the post office is being such a jerk is because he’s frustrated that his wife doesn’t want sex because she’s having a hard time with an orgasm. It worked for me and I have no problem being an evangelist for the machine that helped.

Filed under: Porn Stars |
Posted on December 24th, 2008
Posted by Miss Maggie Mayhem